A Fan of Kitchens, Part B: Do Dreams Come True?!!

19 January 2009
6:45 am


Dearest No Face,

Do you remember my letter to you about me being a big fan of kitchens? I know it goes back to March last year, but for the people who have had the pleasure of reading it at the time of its publication in my blog, it goes back to yesterday! So most of them did not know about my emotional attachment to kitchens and my fancy dream kitchen until yesterday.

Anyways, when I did post that letter my eldest brother read it along with everybody else who learned that another letter was out. Guess what, he gave me that nice sympathetic smile and asked me if I was seriously hoping to witness such lovely dream get crushed by the cruel big hands of our painful reality! Of course I asked him why he thought so, and he replied that for one thing a beautiful heavenly scenery did not go well with an environment closer to a desert than an oasis! I then looked at him and said: " Da!! I will create my own heavenly scenery in my own house and make it a hundred times more beautiful than that dry & depressing surrounding!!" Though I secretly wished I could be anywhere but here; in a place where I'd be surrounded by the color green, a view of the lake and snow in winter!!

Never mind that! After a moment of silence he asked me once again if I truly was that much hopeful about my so called 'No face' one day turning out to be the perfect and absolute 'knight in shining armour', who would miraculously happen to be made to my liking and who, again, would happen to fit the image I have about him to the last teeny-weeny detail! And who would of course grant me my every wish, including that fancy kitchen to be!

I guess at that moment my expression said it all without the need to utter it out loud! Well, I with all due respect to realists in this world-including my big brother- do truthfully hope so!

Gosh! What is wrong with dreaming? What's wrong with wanting the best and praying all the while for the fairy tale to become true?! I mean after all it is just a kitchen; in truth a spacious kitchen in a cozy beautiful house with a paradise-like view of a heaven-like garden! It is that simple;)
And yeah one more thing, it should be shared with my no face, who by a twist of luck and a touch of pure magic may- Notice me saying MAY- turn out to be the dream guy with that love story made in heaven! Here goes, I said it all in one long breath!

Well.. Well.. Well! Dreams don't always come true and cows don't fly and it is not raining men; let alone perfect men the 'McDreamy' sort! 'McDreamy'..? Grey's Anatomy? Oh yeah there you go;)) I am a Huge fan by the way!

Okay okay so I dream big!! Let me be!! I might break my heart or my neck or whatever in the course of this dreaming big thing, but that's me; the lady who cannot stop dreaming! The lady who still believes in happy endings, bed time stories, Cinderella and prince charming and I don't know what else that comes in the package!

BUT, it never kills you to dream, it kills you not to!! So, how close to my dream could you be Mr. NO FACE??

Well, regardless of the pessimism surrounding me, threatening to swallow me, I still love you! And I love my big brother; though a complete realist who always reminds me that the stuff of dreams will eventually bring my downfall!

Love,
Zainab

A Fan of Kitchens!!

2/3/2008
8:00 PM

Dearest No face,

Have I ever told you that I am a big fan of kitchens?! Guess not;P
But now you know..!

Well, I do have a thing for kitchens! I go weak in the knees whenever I come across a picture of a kitchen design in a magazine- I am exaggerating here a little you know-;) It's funny I know, but I cannot help it! Whenever that happens, you'd find me intently staring at the picture and completely lost in thought!

For a start, I'd picture myself the proud owner of that kitchen, or even a better one, and having it all to myself as my special haven, where I'd have the freedom to come up with all kinds of delicious dishes! I'm a good cook by the way, not bragging here;D

My kitchen, the one I dream of having in my future cozy little married nest would be spacious; what happened to the "little cozy nest"! Never mind that, it would be as I said spacious and bright and colorful! I'd love to have it designed very professionally and the most important thing is that it be open on the living room; in a European like style! The other thing is to have it contain elegant low windows overlooking a beautiful garden! The dining table should be placed where that breath-taking view could be completely visible and available for the eyes to enjoy! A dark dreary kitchen is out of the question!!

Here comes the climax of my dream, I'd step into that fancy kitchen of mine, my paradise, and I'd cook.. and cook... and cook! Well, you'd eat it all no doubt! Without me forcing you to do so, though;))

It's good and refreshing to have such a dream; it fills my soul with an intense sense of a joyous anticipation like that of a kid expecting the gift of his dreams on his birthday! It might be silly and insignificant to some, but to me it is a part of a much bigger dream! What I see here is the big picture, and that is enough I guess! Don't they always urge us to aim for the larger picture! This is what I am doing baby!

Now please pleeeeeeeease wherever you are and whoever you turn out to be, grant me this dream kitchen, promise my dear dear no face!

I shall leave you with this splendid image-dream- to entertain you the rest of the day;P

I love you

Zainab

Fallen masks..!!

Sometimes you come across people, who at the first instant, give you the impression that nothing can ever get to them or shake their balance and that solid and controlled composure they seem to possess, no matter what!

You are almost convinced that they are totally unfeeling and immune to any kind of blow life may direct at them at any moment! Those people, to your further conviction, excel in proving you right by maintaining that callous nature and standing their ground firmly and intently!

Doubt, however, seeps into your soul sometimes and arouses in you that sense of wonder about the true inner self of those people! And you begin to ask yourself: are they truly who they pretend to be? Are they genuinely as thick-skinned as they repeatedly show you in various occasions? The answer to such questions usually end up affirmative!

I have recently come across such people and I have always had that one question about them: are they never scared? Doesn't that infuriating feeling of utter strength and superiority ever waver if only for a slight moment?! I do honestly find it hard to believe that totally fearless person exists in the first place! I mean, who hasn't had his moments of fear, indecision, lack of security, doubt and anxiety?! Which one of us is never fearful at times? The answer to this is no doubt "NO ONE"!!

we are all bound to grow weak and fragile at times! We are all likely to go through moments of utter helplessness and even break down in tears if the situation calls for such a freak act!!

At the end of the day, we are only but human beings; flesh and bones! With that unique blend of strengths and weaknesses. We cannot belie that, and we surely cannot prove it wrong no matter how hard we try!

It is never a shame to admit to weakness and fragility if that is the truth. It is not wrong to ask for help or turn to other people for support, providing they can do that for you.

Today, I am writing this to pass the message to anybody who, for some reason, is afraid to show that like everybody else he gets scared and insecure sometimes. To those who hurt themselves trying to appear powerful all the time even if it means intimidating others in the process, this is an absolute mistake!!

However, to my amazement, the truth behind all those fake pretenses is finally revealed! The masks, behind which fearful souls hide, have all fallen; leaving the true identities totally naked to the eye of us witnesses to that show! Well, I guess truth is always bound to spring to the surface at the end of that creepy tunnel of lies.

So, from me to those 'Pretentious' souls, do not be ashamed of being discovered for I am not crowing about having the shrewdness to see through all those layers of phoniness. This is definitely not schadenfreude I am openly displaying! I am merely trying to tell you that pretending to be who you are not is never the key to any kind of victory! It does not take you anywhere! Your only salvation is to simply be who you are and let people choose to accept you with your flaws; we all have flaws!

Believe me, only then will peace engulf your soul and we shall all see a genuine smile lighting your face at the time!