July 29, 2008

Laws of attraction!!

How many times have you looked at a face you happened to come across-by sheer coincidence- and knew at that exact moment that it would somehow make a difference and possibly change the course of your life forever?

How many times have you passed by someone, not knowing who it is and not stopping to look at their face, yet a gut feeling appears out of the blue, persistently telling you to slow down and sneak if only a quick glance at that face! And to your utmost surprise, you do just that without knowing why you did it in the first place!!

Is it chemistry?
Is it magic?
Or is it just another inexplicable phenomenon, which we have long stopped looking for a rational explanation for!?

Well, I guess it is the outcome of having all those possibilities blended together! Which makes it the more puzzling!

Honestly, I do find it extremely strange the way we are attracted to certain people in life, as though an invisible power draws us to them, making us want to be close to them, if only to sense their existence and bask in the feeling of content we get out of that closeness!

Sometimes we do not stop to ask ourselves why, or analyze that turmoil of crazy feelings battling inside of us, causing us to act funny sometimes! All we know is that an unseen chord is linking us to a particular soul, bringing us a step closer to that irresistible aura its beholder seems to possess!

Is that how people develop an affection toward each other? Is that how they fall in love? I really cannot say, for I have always wondered how it'd feel like to have your heart pound in a chaotic rhythm just thinking of its true desire, conjuring their face or even uttering their name!

It is true that every single person has an aura of his own, different from anybody else's! Amazingly, it can either attract you to it the way a butterfly is attracted to light, or drive you miles away; filling you with an eerie sense of disaffection, which you repeatedly fail to analyze or understand!

Yet again, there are those few personalities who fill you with pure wonder, to the extent that you feel undecided whether it is liking or dislike you feel for them! strangely though, you begin to ask yourself endless questions about their true nature and that clear inner reflection of their soul, once they drop their mask of aloofness and indifference. Deep down, you know their is a depth to them they choose not to show, which they expertly disguise, making it even more frustrating for you to understand the identity of what really lies behind that unfathomable appearance!!

And so you remain in a state of puzzlement, not knowing why you are so curious to unveil the truth about who those people truly are!! And no matter how much of an expert you are at reading people's minds by looking into their eyes, some remain immune to your expertise!!

Thus, you just feel as though you were going against a brick wall over and over again! Eventually, you shun away, opting to let time reveal the mystery for you!

Sometimes it does happen, and sometimes not! I guess it is just laws of attraction, as some may put it!!

July 27, 2008

A time to say goodbye!

It is never easy to say goodbye, to part with people who have lingered in your life long enough for you to get used to their presence and cherish the times you spend with them! And it is even harder to have someone sneak out of your life smoothly and guilt-free without even waving a hand of goodbye to you!

One minute they are there at your side, smiling at you, promising you sunny days and reassuring you of always being there for you, the next minute they are gone; just as simple as that!

Genuinely, it has always striked me as baffling the way people keep hurting each other, not stopping for a second to question what they have done or weigh the amount of pain and heartache their ruthless acts must have brought upon people who have trusted them, supported them, stretched a helping hand to them at their times of need, and foremost loved them-unconditionally- without waiting for any favor in return!! But as the saying goes: (What is done cannot be undone)!

Yeah I do agree that at times it is easy to take a hurtful word back or right a minor wrong and even make it up to those you have hurt! But what about the emotional mess you have left behind? What about those loads of deep and incurable wounds you have inflicted on people whose one and only mistake was to let you into their circle of beloved ones! Unthinkable, isn't it?!!

I used to think, or even believe, that people's capacity to love and readiness to cure others by far exceeds that inclination to hurt! How nice and comfortable it is to see the outside world, with all its occupants, through the goodness that lies inside of you! I know!! Yet, sometimes it is better to break free from that dreamy and rainbow-like bubble and wake up to reality, and what a dreadful reality it could be at times! That I have certainly learned!

Now, I know that in life we are bound to come across all sorts of people, some of whom bring sunlight into our days and others excel in turning the light into utmost darkness! Though heartbreaking and devastating this could be, we can always look at the bright side of it, even though I agree that at first glance it would appear as though there is nothing but trauma and grief awaiting to engulf us and shut all hope out! But that is the way of things in real life, we learn to do some things right by making a few mistakes, and we definitely learn to appreciate the smile after shedding tears of pain!

Yes I have been hurt a thousand times, but the consolation I find in that is the fact that this is actually what has made me who I am at the present time, a strong soul willing to conquer the unconquerable!! And believe me, whenever despair threatens to break me, I remember that what does not kill me, no doubt makes me stronger!!

So, here I am today: standing tall and smilingly waving a hand of goodbye to every tear, every wound and every painful memory lurking in the recess of my mind! For now is truly the time to say goodbye to all.

July 16, 2008

A Love Letter!!!

I know how hard writing tends to be sometimes! I know it can break you to know that you have what it takes to become a good writer, yet you find yourself unable to present a coherent and graspable thought to whoever is interested in reading your words!

This has been happening to me for sometime now, and all I can say here is that this is driving me to destruction! Truth is, I have been trying to post something on my blog for days but to no avail! My mind is crowded with a hundred thoughts that long to be set free and are screaming for release, BUT nothing comes out on paper!!

However, luck has knocked on my door unexpectedly today, and for that I am truly grateful! Here is what happened:

As I sat at my desk at work early in the morning, a cup of steaming delicious tea in my hand and a number of newspapers in front of me, waiting to be read, a title grabbed my attention in the Bahrain Tribune, it said: "Love letter jigsaw takes 15 years"!!

Honestly, I do not know what it was that halted my quick monitoring of that specific page, I just felt that slight twinge of interest and curiosity in my heart, telling me stop right there, read this!! Strange how the mind reacts to certain things and therein arouses a particular reaction towards them, isn't it?! Anyways, I cast my cup aside, though normally nothing will make me do this, roused from my morning sleeplessness and dedicated all my senses to reading this piece of news! Guess what, it was about a man who spent 15 years piecing together 2,000 fragments of love letters to his late wife which she tore up when she caught someone reading them!! Can you believe this?? The guy is now 82, and he wrote 98 letters to his wife during the 7 years he spent traveling Europe as a farm worker!

That is not the end of the story though, hear this out: he began putting the pieces back together in 1993 and has just completed the laborious task, 3 years after his wife died! Not only that, he started by separating the corners and center pieces, which were more than 20 and made up more than 2,000 fragments (some smaller than a thumbnail), then progressed putting them all together by spending an hour everyday for 15 years!! Now he is finally done, and guess what? He is planning to write a book based on his letters to his late wife, Molly.

Honestly, what do you make out of that? For me, this is almost a fairy tale that rarely happens in real life! I mean, people tend to become more and more materialistic as days pass, which has left no time for emotions for some! Of course I am not generalizing here, for I still think there are men out there who would stop at nothing to make their beloved ones truly happy! But this much romance? Lucky her!

I am not a pessimist when it comes to love, not at all! Nevertheless, I find it quite hard to believe that a man like Ted Howard, our protagonist here, exists in multitude! However, I cannot be a hundred percent sure, for to me "Love" remains a dream to be realized one day; my knight in shining armor has not yet arrived! So the judgment remains to you dear reader, and I genuinely hope you have found that kind of love!

Just to make your heart thump the way mine did when I read this letter, here is part of one of Ted's letters to his Molly:

"Well, my dear, I am looking forward to seeing you again. It seems months since Sunday when I last saw you. There does not seem to be a lot more to write about, my love, so until we meet again, I send you all my love, from your ever loving sweetheart, Ted"!

So, with this glimpse of that Romeo-like love, I leave you. And believe me, if it doesn't pleasure you as much as it did me, it would at least draw a smile of wonder on your lips.

And yeah, all that morning drowsiness I suffered from just minutes ago, has seeped out of my door, leaving my heart light like a feather!

July 14, 2008


A muffled moan of pain,
a sound I remember

That face in anguish,
that look of innocent wonder!

So close to the truth we came,
so close to surrender!

Yet he withdrew.. Simply ran!
leaving my wound exposed and tender!

Am I to question love?
Am I to leave?
Or am I to linger?!

14 July 2008