November 25, 2008

No Face.. Happy Birthday!

Well, it is "No Face"..

After a long absence and plenty of waiting from so many people!!
Here goes, another letter, the second actually..

However, just a small note, the letters I will publish here will be of my choice,,
that is: I might skip some and choose particular ones, but all of them would start from the oldest to the newest-most recent- in terms of time (dates)!

Today's letter is dated 12, April, 2008
And just so you know, it is right the second one I wrote after that first one;)


12, April, 2008

Dear No face,,

It's my birthday today!! I've turned 26, and it feels so unlikely overwhelming!!
I cannot say why it does, but to me it feels different from my previous birthdays!!

At the moment, I'm lying on my bed writing this letter to you and wondering how this birthday would turn out if you were a real person, with a face! How you would react to it or what you could come up with to celebrate my day and turn it into a very special occasion!

If you were real, you'd definitely be a romantic person, a very romantic person so to speak! Don't ask me why I'm even assuming this, it is just a gut feeling I have about you my sweet;P

Well, birthdays are supposed to be happy and exuberant occasions, but as you grow up they start to take a totally different turn. I'm not saying that because I'm obsessed with age or getting older; not at all! I'm not the least reluctant to declare to you that I have turned 26! Actually, I'm happy to announce that; 26 for me is the peak of femininity and maturity.

For me, every additional year is an enhancement to my wisdom and my sense of knowledge and awareness of my surroundings and people and all. Yet, those distant birthdays of my childhood years were different; they tasted different!

Back then, birthdays merely implied a big party, friends and family gathering and lots of presents. I guess back then we were completely oblivious to the underlying spiritual and psychological concept of 'Birthdays'. Nothing truly mattered to us except having fun and opening the gifts zealously at once!

Of course there's nothing wrong with that, it's normal, accepted and expected! It is just that today I feel different, the 'birthday' thing feels different. Besides my spontaneous thrill at my birthday, there's the feeling of anxiety and wonder. I cannot deny that I look and feel pensive today, but it's beyond me really. I know you must be feeling puzzled by my reaction, you might even be asking yourself questions now, right?

The thing is, as you enter your twenties it's like you begin to wake up from your stance and shake off that cocoon of past ignorance and nonchalance! You unconsciously start to want more of life and you become more demanding when it comes to your expectations regarding the future! At a certain point in time, you sort of become restless, kinda undecided and needy! The future all of a sudden turns into something scary; in the sense that it troubles you to try and digest the thought of not knowing who you'd become in this vast universe! I'm talking big here, aren't I??

I don't know whether you understand what I'm talking about or not, but I'm full of questions today, full of fears and expectations! Today, I have moved a step closer to my unknown destiny, towards tomorrow, which I cannot but pursue with huge and endless dreams and ambitions tucked safely deep within!

Now that I'm literally a day older than yesterday, I'm planning to simply dream big! Isn't that what wise people in life advice us to do; to dream big? Well, I'll do even better than that; I'll dream bigger!!

So, for now: Happy Birthday to me;)



rawan said...

woooooohooooo, it is delicious Zainabbbby.

I like it,,, no no ,, I LOVE it.
I'll start envying No Face ;)

I can’t think of a more spontaneous yet wonderful idea.

You actually exceed your ambitions, so you have to bring your ambitions a bit bigger than just ""dream bigger"" ;) to suit your real being.

hehehehe,, got my point baby??

rawan said...

Oooh and Happy Birthday sugeraya :o

Solidad said...

Hayati you are the sugaraya;))
And thank you thank you for the birthday greeting and your sooo lovely comment!!

It is a big boost to me, your words, and it fills me with humble pride:))

Heey i like the idea about you envying 'no face' in the sense that he does feel real to the extent that you are on the brink of actually envying him;)

You love the letter, and I love you:))

rawan said...

Loooove yooou :D

Bluetiful Nostalgia said...

Ahem… THAT was splendid my dear. The way you talked about your birthday and your fears of the future is totally understandable. I have experienced such things from 2 of my friends. They were fearful and at the same time excited of what to come. Unlike me, I guess, I was and still am waiting for the rest of the day to unfold in front of my eyes. I LOVE THIS and I encourage you to do the same. Don’t think of the future much, just dream “BIGGER” and feel the future’s breeze slowly brushes you with sweet surprises and excitement. Whether good or bad days, don’t have any kind of fear cause life will always be beautiful especially for such an amazing person as yourself<-- YEAH I MEAN IT!! Ee wallah ;)

Fear is something totally built in, I know, but you can get rid of it by using your rainbows and chocolates *wink* forcefully ;)

Ahem… LOVED the letter. It’s so delightful and charming.

Zanobia… You are the PROUD owner of 26 years (il3omor killah). I always use “proud” cause it’s the way I feel. You will realize your dreams sooner than later “Insha’Allah”. I totally have faith in you.

One more thing...
When in fear
Come near
You will see
Your friend will veer
For you…
To hear
You speak
Of this and that
While your rainbow

A squeeze

A hug that will
All your fears.

Love you sweets

Solidad said...

OMG Hadeel, I still have tears in my eyes because of your sweeeet and heart felt comment!

You actually made me want to go back in time, to my birthday, and re-read this lovely comment and have all my fears walk out the door!!

Habebti you are the amazing person!! YOU ARE WALLAH;))

I loved the small poem, it is refreshing and rainbow like sweetie, it is my rainbow now;)

Super big hug to you:))))
You made my day!!

Love u too

Bluetiful Nostalgia said...

(: Love you :)

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